Monday, February 16, 2015

I survived valentines day…but that shouldn't suggest that I don't have battle scars.

Valentines day…(cue the doom music in the background)

For people in love (and on Facebook) it is the ideal opportunity for them to post pictures and brag about how awesome their significant other is evidenced by the pictures of the romantic dinner they cooked them or the overpriced gift left by the plate. Good for you…

It's also an opportunity for single people or people recovering from a horrible breakup to either eloquently write their suicide note and slit their wrists in the bath tub or put on a brave face and act like their not phased by the one holiday that makes people who are not in a relationship feel like utter shit.

Valentines day last year, I was going through a miserable breakup. Oddly enough, the separation occurred a few days before Valentines day. I'm not by nature a romantic though I give in other ways. But last year, I actually took the time to put sincere thought into my gift and took the time to prepare it so that it was just perfect. Unfortunately, my partner at the time had other plans which included breaking up with me and completely blocking me from every social media site that we were connected through. Nice huh?

It was in that moment that I came to the the conclusion that I was cursed and Valentines day would never be the same for me. I would forever wander the earth with this bitter taste in my mouth about this ridiculously sentimental commercial holiday that doesn't celebrate people who aren't paired up.


And then I had a thought. Well several actually. I "could" feel sorry for myself. I could scroll up and down my Facebook page and roll my eyes at all the "love" that was flying off  of my screen and think, oh please they'll be broken up in a year. But then I realized that I didn't want to give my ex or rather anyone that type of power over me. I didn't want him to take away my ability to believe that long lasting genuine love was possible.

So I decided in that moment that I refused to be one of those creepy bitter bitches who walks around saying "men aint shit" and hating on couples who are genuinely happy. I also made the decision to stop comparing myself to other people. Because no matter how many happy pictures you post on Facebook, no one really knows what is going on behind the curtain.

So I am taking a stand against any bitterness within me that may be attempting to form. I'm looking it in the face and telling it to go f*ck itself. I'm telling it that I believe in love and now when I see happy pictures of couples on Facebook or even two people walking down the street utterly infatuated with each other, I think to myself "Aww, that's sweet. I hope that happens for me one day. "